I realized I had the fever when I was 5 years old and in Kindergarten. My favorite "free play' of choice was the kitchen area. I loved to play house with my best friend Nitika and together we raised our baby, who happened to be of the African persuasion. I refused to play with the white baby doll and wasn't even a little bit quiet about my feelings on how the black baby was clearly the cuter and far more superior choice, to my classmates who all seemed to be slightly confused.
As the years progressed, I found myself having crushes on the dark boys in class and appreciating their stellar performances on the field during recess. I even noticed that the black girls in class seemed to take a liking to me. They liked me so much that one day during gym class I got to be 'Michelle" in their Destiny Child "Survivor" music video reenactment, a shining moment in my life. My first boyfriend in middle school was even half black and I'll never forget our first slow dance to the very romantic "rock the boat" by Aaliyah [RIP.]
It wasn't until high school that it became apparent that there was anything out of the ordinary about my preference in the opposite sex. I never in a million years thought that there would or should be anything bizarre about it. I mean, who really cares who I find attractive or what kind of guy I prefer? I have had to defend myself to countless people and have been on both sides of the racism spectrum and find all the fuss to be quite uncalled for and dramatic.
So today, I am keeping it really real with all you rad readers and letting you know exactly...
Why I Have Jungle Fever
1. Black men can dance...and jump. I don't know why but it is documented in history that black men (and women) have some serious rhythm ! It's like they come out of the birth canal knowing how to move their hips and bob their heads appropriately to every kind of tune to come out of a juke box. I can only hope that one day I with give birth to a half breed that gets their fathers dancing genes because their mommy had to work very hard for the minimal amount of dancing skills she has. I personally appreciate everything about a man that can work a dance floor and is willing to share their surplus of rhythm knowledge with a girl in need of it like me!
I also enjoy dating men with athletic ability and get pumped up and if I'm being honest here, turned on, when someone that I am involved with is capable of dunking during a competitive basketball game. This is a time when I am thankful that it is "White men that can't jump" and not black men.
2. I was an African American in a previous life. There is no doubt in my mind that I was black in my last life. The passion I feel deep within my bones when I read or hear about the slavery that happened here on American soil is almost too much for me to handle at times. The same goes for when I read about Rosa Parks, I raise the roof and do a fist pump every time I think of how she took that stand and refused to go the back of the bus. There is no if, and or buts about it--I was not white in my past life.
3. I am afraid of penises that are pink in color. This is pretty self explanatory. I believe that my adversion to pink genitals may be a result from the phrase "two in the pink one in the stink." I heard this phrase before I was at an age where I could truly understand what it meant and it scarred me for life. I also don't really like the color pink that much at all; I am not a fan of ham, or the pink clothing line at Victoria Secrets, strawberry ice cream, pink highliters and definitely not a pink mandingo.
4. The possibility of one day actualizing my dream of creating a beautiful, mulatto offspring. Let's call it what it is, there is probably nothing cuter in the entire galaxy than a mixed baby. You don't agree? Well, below you will find a few pictures of some of the most adorable mixed children and if your mind isn't changed then you are probably not a real person and you and I might not get along in real life.
5. Black men typically appreciate a women with curves more than a white man (typically) does. It is no secret that black guys love themselves some Titty and ass (T&A) and I really like this about them. I am definitely a curvy girl and have been ever since the puberty fairy tapped me with her magic wand one night in the 8th grade. I don't date black men just because they like to have 'cushin for their pushin' but I do date them because who wouldn't want to date someone who appreciates, honors, and loves their body as is?
Lamar loves all 5'10 of Khloe Kardashiasn sexy and shapely self.
New York Knicks golden child married and procreated with the beautiful and bodacious former MTV VJ "LaLa"
HOVA put a ring on the hottest chick in the game wearing his chain's finger. Bey and Jay have also just announced this evening that they will be expecting their very own roc baby. <3 <> <3
Kanye West dated the voluptuous vixen, Amber Rose for quite some time. Yeezy taught her.
Sure, they're a little bit crazy and a lot a bit hot mess but Ice loves coco and her badaboombadabing type body.
Need I say more?
6. Once you go you black, you never go back. Although I like to think of myself as far too intelligent and self aware to fall victim to one of the most common cliche's to ever exist; I must accept that in this case, I just cannot deny it. I went black a long time ago and have never had the desire to go back. I think that this is where I will stay for an indefinite period of time.
7. Black Don't Crack. I am known for living in the moment but a little known fact about me is that I actually love to plan. I love to look into the future and envision what I want for myself. I know that I want to be super successful, I want to be a master of as many trades as I possibly can be, I want to be be a mother, I would like to not fall off and become a rough looking Rhonda and be married to a man who also maintains his looks. I have heard through the grapevine that black does not crack and true to form I have done my research;
Father of 3, married for 13 years and definitely not as young as he once was. Will Smith still has got it going on though! He is a DILF for real.
One of the best actors of our time, Denzel Washingtons ages with grace. My man.
Despite wearing a hat that makes him look like a penis, LL Cool J can still get it.
Man boobies and all, Rev Run is simply one of the best MC's/ humans to ever walk the planet. I am obsessed with everything he does, he deserved this shout out.
PS; I love all humans, no matter their ethnicity, color, sexual preference, ect and hope that doesn't go overlooked. I personally and privately just prefer my men tall, dark and handsome =D
Get with it or get lost,
Bcoll$
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